As a result though, I've had plenty of time to collect my thoughts....and my Pet Peeves. I originally had titled this post "A Whole Slew of Pet Peeves" where I planned on taking on about 10 pet peeves per usual to make up for my time away from The Grog.
However, one of my pet peeves has proven to be irresistible for me to focus on.
Thus, we're just going to look at this ridiculous story coming out of a hockey game.
This new Hockey story is taking the cake on my list of Pet Peeves. It started out as a virtually small story, then grew big enough to be put on national news services like YahooNews<--You can read the news story there.
If you haven't heard already, a Duxbury (MA) hockey player/his parents are leveling an Assault and Battery charge against a Scituate (MA) player for a late hit during a hockey match. This hit resulted in the "victim," a Thomas Hannon, suffering from a severe concussion. The A&B charge only came after the Scituate player, Alex Way, did not apologize to the Hannon's and Scituate High School did not suspend the player for two games. Hannon's father stating "We didn't come out of the clear blue with this...this could have all been taken care of with a small meeting between coaches and players. No one on their end wanted to do that."
So what makes more sense here. Is it Hannon's lawyer saying: "If this (check) was off the rink, on a public way, that is gross, negligent assault and battery."
Or is it the comment from the Scituate side, stating "It was an intentional hit, but every check is an intentional hit. When players sign up for hockey, they acquiesce to hits."
First of all. Hannon's lawyer is a moron. He basically just undermined the entire argument the Hannon family is trying to make by stating if the check was off the rink it would be Assault and Battery.
Late hit or not I'm clearly going to agree with Way's lawyer. We're talking about hockey. Shit happens. Is this going to become a regular thing? That's ridiculous. Leveling an A&B charge against a hockey play for a hit in a contact sport? Based off of this logic everyone in the sport of MMA should be arrested immediately.
When you sign up to do a contact sport....you might want to be aware that there comes some physical risks. Would I be happy about a concussion? Or getting lit the fuck up and having it caught on camera? No. But I'm not going to sit around and mope and feel sorry for myself, or let my parents file a criminal suit against the guy.
This is going to go down in history as that single moment in time where every stereotype about Duxbury was reaffirmed in the minds everyone in the South Shore of MA. Granted, for the Duxbury (or Suxbury...take your pick) side this incident probably reaffirms the stereotypes they have about Scituate.
If you're not from MA I'll narrow down the town dynamics for you on perceptions of each Town's teenage population:
Duxbury: Also called Suxbury. Duxbury guys are generally received as sucky douchebags who fit the category of "that guy," but still come off as wussy douchebags at that. Duxbury 7s will treat themselves like 10s while actual 10s will treat themselves as 2s (like in a "no you're lying, I am actually fat" kind of way).
Bottom Line: Its called Suxbury for a reason. There's a theory that somewhere in Duxbury, the residents guard a tree that grows assholes at a yearly rate.
Scituate: Scituate is just....Scituate. Despite being named "The Most Irish Town in America" its pretty bland. Big on fishing. Not much else to say. Pretty bland town. Perceived scummy by some, but generally considered higher than Weymouth and Hull.
Bottom Line: More bland then it's perceived scummy.
Also on the South Shore:
Weymouth: Defined as a working-class town with the "hicks of the North." If you want all the benefits the stereotypical American-South backwoods provide; like woodland camo hats and flannel, big trucks and hobbies that other towns deem retarded, Weymouth is the place to be. Also has some social niches which come off as misguided borderline neo-nazis with shaved heads and distinct Germanic pride. While not a big part of Weymouth, this social niche received notoriety after two homeless men were beaten to death with baseball bats for fun in Hingham's BareCove Park. One guy's hand was cut off and then taken to a Weymouth party as proof for the confirmed kill, and after being arrested one of the murderers conspired to kill witnesses who would take the stand against him.
Bottom Line: Weymouth youth stay classy.
Hingham: Seen as a rich white suburbia with zero diversity and white people who get offended by everything for other people. Stereotypes within the town itself split it up into two sections: North Hingham and South Hingham. Half of North Hingham is normal, the other half however being populated with upper/upper middle class douches that live in extravagant harbor-side houses near the Yacht club. Despite being given cars by mom and dad, Rich Northern Hinghamites proceed to become troublesome pricks that fall into drugs, alcohol and stealing. Tend to make up the Lax and Hockey douchebag ranks of Hingham High who listen to rap and subsequently as a result dress like thugs, and take Facebook profile pictures of dipping+no shirts to heart.
Also hailing from North Hingham: weird perverse sexual stories. Comments towards "Couch-Boy," "Cucumber-man," "Razor Scooter Girl" or "The Frozen Hot Dog," "Lax Trophy," "Private Gym Session" and the "Best-Friend" incidences are noted. Pictures of the "hook-up couch" are forever grained into the memories of all, while "private-sexts" flame out of control and go to everyone in the school. Stories of losing virginity in graveyards, public streets or party skiing and frequent trips to the Eiffel tower are not uncommon when talking about North Hinghamites. Also not uncommon: Hockey and Lax bros committing stat rape. Because nothing says "I'm a badass" like being a high school senior drinking a normal water bottle while watching freshmen girls get blackout drunk off of vodka water bottles.
South Hingham is generally populated with solid-middle class or recent middle-class types who hate to say they hail from Hingham because of the negative stigma attached to it courtesy of the Rich North (regular Northerners generally share the same characteristics of South Hinghamites). They get shit on by Rich North Hinghamites for being "poor," unless they live in Black Rock. Tend to drive shittier cars than the Rich Northerners and either work physical labor in other towns or caddy at Black Rock. That's not to say there isn't a fair share of Southern douchebags who desperately try to attach themselves to the Northern niches.
Bottom Line: If you're not a rich North Hinghamite, chances are you just tell people you're from Boston or South of Boston.
Cohassett: Also called Coho, known for a preppy attitude mixed with hot bids and crazy parties. Generally upper class but somehow not as douchey about it as North Hinghamites. Victoria's Subs is the best eating establishment on the planet, and if someone tells you to go to Hingham's Sub Galley instead they deserve prompt slapping. JJ's Icecream is also a highlight of Coho.
Bottom Line: Probably just as rich as North Hingham, yet not filled with tyrannous PC soccer moms, self-righteous activists, or rich metrosexual adopted douchebags who will make fun of you for driving a Ford.
Hull: Associated with grunge. Referred to as a shit-hole. If you want to hit up some drugs, or promiscuous behavior with a side order of disease, go to Hull.
Bottom Line: Don't go to Hull.
Why?
Because http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F4qzPbcFiA, that's why.
Norwell: An equally bland neighboring South Shore town. Norwellians are either normal folk or weirdos. Like I'm 27 and I'm screwing your 17 year old classmate kind of weirdos.
Bottom Line: Norwell is more bland than Scituate.
Hanover: Only useful for its mall and movie theater.
Bottom Line: No one knows anything about Hanover other than that it has a mall and a movie theater. Also, the people who run Hanover's Patriot Cinemas theater are Nazis.
So there ya go. This is basically the nasty little dynamic that runs in between the towns of the South Shore. Can stereotypes be proven wrong? For the most part there are always exceptions, yes. Do we generally perceive each other as these statements before we get to know each other however? Yes. Perception is Reality until proved otherwise.
So what's the bottom line here.
This hockey story reaffirmed the stereotype about Duxbury youth.
This is one of those moments where "Nut up and Shut Up" is more in order than "Point the finger and Blame." Maybe this all falls on the parents of the guy, maybe he actually isn't a soft-wad who doesn't want to be associated with this outcome and actually is angry with parents for being of the-"easily offended, whitepeopleproblems suburbia types."
Regardless of whether or not this kid is an active part of the criminal suit, that whole list of stereotypes above is the reason why this sort of action is an ultimate failure. That kid is going to get shit on for the rest of his life. Everyone in Duxbury is going to be shit on even more than before. Parents of Duxbury are now going to be perceived as worse than the parents of Marblehead (and that's saying a lot).
Duxbury might as well just disband as a town in light of this event....nobody in their right mind would want to be tied to this stupid drama clamoring of white-people-problems.
You have to love the mom of the Scituate player telling it how it is when describing what happened after her own son got a concussion earlier in football: "We did not point fingers because its a contact sport. Its one of the risks of playing a contact sport."
Good for her, good for Scituate, and good for Alex Way.
Bad for Duxbury. Extremely bad for the parents of Hannon. Even worse for Hannon himself.
I can already envision the chants and signs that are going to show up at Duxbury hockey games next season...
--Fin--
