The Bandwagon Appeal

Being a sports fans is one of the most unifying experiences that our culture has to offer. Fans of all different shapes, sizes, ages, races, and genders gather together to watch the sport of their choice. And the world of sports has more types of fans than Baskin Robbins has ice cream flavors. For example there are the the trivia guides, or the fans who looks up unique statistics and challenge all of their friends to figure out who accomplished these feats. There are the casual sports fans, or a person who watches sports for recreation without getting too involved with statistics. Also in the world of sports viewing are the super passionate fans who seems to know every inch of ground their team has ever walked on. But out of all of the different types of fans that exist, the single most annoying type of sports fan is the fair weathered fan because of their false commitment to their teams.

(Fair weathered fans are also called fake fans and bandwagon jumpers)

The unholy birth of the fair weathered fans does not have a specific date; however, since the dawn of the internet age, the number of fair weathered fans in the United States alone has shot up like Rafael Palmeiro used to shoot up steroids. Fortunately for the true fans, like the five foot four hight requirement needed to ride all amusement park rides, there are certain qualifications that need to be met in order for people to be considered fair weathered fans. These bandwagon jumpers are the people without a real interest in sports, but as soon as their friends get hyped up about it, they pretend to care too. These fake fans also are incapable of naming eight players on their team without the immediate assistance of their smart phone, computer, or phoning a friend. If you take those three lifelines away from the bandwagon jumpers become nothing more than bumbling idiots. So now that we have identified what a fair weathered fan is, how does one spot them? Actually, they are pretty hard to miss.

 Catching a fair weathered fan in the act of faking their passion for a team is easier than one might think. Fair weathered fans are notoriously unintelligent regarding their team outside of the guys that sports analysts say are playing well. One way in which you can catch these fake fans is by asking them to name about six players on the team they follow in about a fifteen second span; and they need do so without the assistance of a smart phone, computer, or another person. If they can not complete the challenge or if they somehow complete the challenge and a sense of relief seems to come over their face, you have found them out.

Suppose that they complete the first challenge and you still question if they are real fans or not. Then it's on to the next challenge: ask them about how the rest of the league is doing this season. All sports fans keep tabs on how other teams are doing in order to compare their team's performance. For example, Red Sox fans will keep tabs on the Toronto Blue Jays because they play each other tomorrow. But fair weathered fans are oblivious to what is going on in the rest of the league. Suppose a fan starts watching the Boston Bruins playoff run and you question their fandom. Simply ask them to name 4 other teams that made the playoffs: excluding the Bruins and their current opponent (the Vancouver Canucks): without their precious lifelines. If they answer correctly, they are indeed real fans. Fair weathered fans who fail the challenge will get flustered and mad at you for asking them stupid questions.

 Aww did I hurt your feelings fake fan?

Those are the ways to catch the easy prey, now on to the fair weathered fan that is harder to find: the one from a different state who supports your favorite team. Now catching fake fans from another state is slightly harder than calling out your buddy who is spouting malarkey. The reason for this is because not all of them are band wagon jumpers. For example, someone who grew up in Atlanta, but moved to Texas can still call themselves real Atlanta fans; so long as they can prove they know what they are talking about. That is the only wrinkle, so the fandom tests mentioned above will still weed out the weak. This issue needs to be addressed because of all the fans of the Boston Red Sox that poped up in California after the Sox won the World Series in 2004. Guarantee those fans were not rooting for the Sox for the 86 years that they didn't win the World Series.

Yeah I called you out, what are you going to do about it?

Now it is simple to catch a fair weathered fan, but what if you are interested in sports, but are afraid of being considered fair weathered fan? It is okay to start to get into sports because your friends are, but there is no need to try and know everything right away. You can watch the game with your friends and just enjoy the game. Also, there is nothing wrong with asking questions about rules of sports or what makes one player better than that one; that is simply part of the learning process. Where new fans get into trouble is when they feel the need to prove that they have followed a team longer than someone else. So they over compensate by bookmarking ESPN.com and liking every post that has to do with their friend's team on Facebook. Those actions put them squarely down the path to fair weathered fandom. And nobody likes a fair weathered fan.

By contributing writer: CJ Dudek